The Joys of Having Children
My wife woke me up at around 1:30 a.m. on February 17, 2024, and conveyed that she believed she was having contractions. I, in my infinite wisdom, advised that she would be able to tell for sure whether she was having contractions in due time; I further suggested that it would be nice to get a few more hours of sleep, and that perhaps we could head into the hospital in the morning if she still thought she was in labor. This suggestion was not particularly well received. She continued to insist that she thought she was having contractions, so we timed how far apart they were. When we discovered they were just over four minutes apart, I concurred she was likely headed into labor and we departed for the hospital shortly thereafter. We arrived to the hospital at 2:20 a.m.; we made our way up to the room and at around 2:35 I went to park the car and grab our luggage. Thinking I had plenty of time, I nearly stopped for a coffee on my way back up to the room, but my hands were quite full and I decided I better wait. Good thinking, because I got back to the room at 2:47 a.m. and our daughter was born promptly at 3:00 a.m. Thus it was that one of the best moments of my life occurred on a cold snowy morning at 3:00 a.m. in a sterile hospital room in Creve Coeur, MO.
In our culture today, children are looked on by many as an inconvenience, a money pit, and a burden. Many individuals put off having children for years because of financial concerns, educational or career pursuits, or simply because they feel they aren’t ready or aren’t interested. Why be bogged down by children when you could go to Cabo anyway? These people, however, make a terrible mistake. Sure, children can be tiring at times, and your free time has a way of dwindling. They can even be somewhat expensive at times (though they need not be as expensive as some people think). These, I suppose, are the costs of parenthood. Less free time, a greater demand on your time and on your physical body, increased expenses, and perhaps a bit less sleep.
What’s the upside, one might ask? The answer to that is immense satisfaction and joy. One of the reasons that the birth of my daughter was one of the best moments of my life is because I got to witness my wife give of herself. Due to the quick labor, my wife did not have any time for an epidural or even so much as an IV. Christ said, “This is my body, given up for you.” So, too, my wife grit her teeth, bore the pain, and gave her body up for the sake of another. Not counting the cost or focusing on the pain she had just endured, she immediately exclaimed to our daughter right after the birth, “O, Siena!!” Seeing my bride give of herself in such a sacrificial manner was immensely beautiful; it made me respect her and fall in love with her all the more. Indeed, that image left an indelible mark on me, and is one that I will cherish forever. This is just one of the many joys that children bring, and it is a joy that couples who refuse to open themselves up to having children miss out on.
Another joy that children bring is the gift of laughter. Now, my wife and I had a happy marriage prior to having a child. But we didn’t just start belly laughing out of nowhere. Indeed, I could barely get her to laugh at my jokes! Now, however, our home is filled with laughter. Our daughter will randomly do something amusing at 8:10 on a Wednesday night and we start cracking up for several minutes. Just a week or two ago, we were travelling to Nashville for Thanksgiving and we had stopped at a gas station in Paducah, Kentucky for gas, coffee, and to nurse our daughter, Siena. Siena started doing something rather funny, and we started belly laughing. There we were, on a cold Tuesday night before Thanksgiving, at a gas station in Paducah, with tears in our eyes from laughing. I can assure you that would not have happened before having a child.
One of the ironic aspects of the story above is that prior to Siena, we would drive straight to Nashville without having to make any stops at all. Thus, the stop in Paducah is essentially an inconvenience, but it is a necessary inconvenience because our daughter has to eat. However, it was within in the midst of this inconvenience that we ended up having an incredible laugh and amusement. Such is the case with children. They can certainly be an inconvenience, and as I laid out above, they are a demand on one’s time, talents, and treasure. It is in the midst of that, though, that an abundance of joy can emerge. And it is when we are at the service of something or someone greater than ourselves that we actually learn how to love, how to be Christlike, and how to live a life worth living.
Indeed, children can be complicated at times. But, with God’s grace and with a proper disposition on our part, they can help sanctify us, strengthen our marriages, and help us to start laughing uncontrollably at a mediocre gas station in the middle of Kentucky. Cabo and Sunday brunches can wait! Children cannot. Have children and be happy already!
Liam
12/07/2024
